- Install Death Metal music around auto-tellers to motivate 'old people' to get their shit done FASTER (a recent trial at Redfern station produced similar results with young people and classical music).
- An immediate moratorium on Queen's ' Bohemian Rhapsody' - No commercial radio station shall be allowed to play THAT song for at least a period of 18 months between rotation. Fuck you Wayne's World; it was ready to die at last and now they play it still EVERY FUCKING DAY!!
- Jihad on Jamie Oliver
- Customer admisitered therapy to motivate the attitude of surly young people who work in retail
- Hand portable car batteries and nipple clamps for responisble adults while retail shopping.
- Fast Food chain restaurants will be obliged not to serve fat people, for their own good.
More rules to follow...
2 comments:
With rule 4) you have proved that you have joined the legion of old farts.
'the kids in my day...'
I dig the fast food one, they cant serve alcohol to the dangerously drunk so why can they serve faty food to the obese ?
Customer: Gimme another round of Fried Chicken and Chips !
Waiter: I think you've had enough already Sir, let me call you a taxi, or maybe a mini-van
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